Naive Kindness

Read:

Matthew 10:16 (ESV) "Behold, I am sending you out as sheep in the midst of wolves, so be wise as serpents and innocent as doves."

What it is saying to me:

As an adolescent, it seemed to me that kindness and wisdom lived on opposite ends of a spectrum. You could be sharp and witty, or you could be soft and kind, but not necessarily both. Of course, if you read this verse, it becomes clear that Jesus wasn't stuck in that kind of binary thinking. He's sending his disciples into a genuinely hostile world (wolves aren't a metaphor for "mild inconveniences") and his instruction isn't "toughen up" or "grow a thicker skin." It's "be wise as serpents and innocent as doves." Both. At the same time.

The tension between those two things show up in real life more than we'd like. Have you ever confused self-protection with sin? Like guarding your heart or setting a boundary was somehow the opposite of loving your neighbor? What about doing the reverse: letting people walk all over you and calling it grace, when really it was just fear of conflict wearing a Christianese costume?

Kindness isn't a strategy to be exploited. It's not a technique you use to get people to like you, and it's not a bargaining chip, used in hopes that others will treat you the same way.

Kindness is a fruit of the Spirit, which is great news to me, because it means it's not something I can manufacture through sheer effort or personality. It's a character trait the Spirit grows in me. So I can seek wisdom from above, and grow kindness by the Holy Spirit. When you think about it that way, Jesus' instructions seem much more attainable then.

What Is It Saying to You?

• Where have you called avoidance "wisdom" or called weakness "kindness"?

• Is there a relationship right now where staying quiet is actually the unkind thing to do?

• Do you trust God enough to be honest with someone and still love them well?

What Are We Going to Do About It?

Identify one situation where you've confused self-protection with unkindness (or the reverse), and ask God specifically for the wisdom to tell the difference.